A Mom’s Guide to Tattoos

There is a bit of a stigma associated with tattoos in the ‘burbs.  I thought it would be a great time to address my thoughts on the subject being that my dear husband and I just celebrated our anniversary with a trip to the tattoo shop!

I am going to refrain from getting all heated (as if I am trying to defend myself…I’m not defending myself, right?).

To start, here is my tat background: I got my first tattoo when I was 22. I thought for a long time about it, and got something that symbolized what was most important in my life – my faith. It is a Chinese symbol for Spirit & Soul on my lower back. A few years ago, I had three stars tattooed on my right shoulder blade to represent my three kids. Then about 2 years ago, I had a dove done on my foot.

And finally (but probably not finally), a few days ago, I had some work done on my foot to make it more beautiful and had my stars filled in. I am in no way an expert in this world of tattooing – but I have spent a good few hours of my life in a tattoo shop thus declaring myself “expertish.”

So, here are my Tat Rules that I give to my nearest and dearest friends:

1. Do something that means something. And, what is meaningful to me may not be meaningful to you so no judging!  Never feel bad about what you choose to be meaningful!  Unless its a cartoon character – then feel bad.
2. No neck or face when you still have to run carpool or go to your kids’ soccer games.
3. Think about it. Run it by a few people. Think about it more. Google it. Pray about it if you need to. Think about it more. Then go get it.
4. Be sober(ish). Being that it is actually illegal for a tattoo artist to work on someone who has been drinking, this is pretty easy – but for real – a drunk tattoo is one you will likely regret.
5. Ask for an artist referral from a friend (or me). Go meet & take your ideas to them. Schedule a time to come back.
6. Be completely confident in your decision before you do it.

I would love to hear your thoughts and any additional rules you would like to add! Play nice though!

When Shauna isnt hanging around tattoo shops or keeping your dear website afloat – she is providing more unsolicited advice over at Blah Blah Blog!

Baby, You can Drive My Car

For the month of September, the casa de phillips station wagon is getting a bit of an overhaul.

It is going from this (*):

Into this:

Yep, I am going to be driving a Chevy Malibu for the entire month of September. and will be taking each of you readers along for the ride

(Figuratively speaking, of course. Unless I know you in real life…then you are more than welcome to come along for the ride. You could even star in a video if you want.)

One might ask…what are you going to do for the entire month of September while driving around in a car free from sippy cup stains and goldfish crumbs?

My first answer is “Relish in all its glorious cleanliness while chatting with the On-Star representative“.

My second answer is “Continue my daily life as a mom/writer/casa de phillips CEO while I cruise around town in a sporty car completing some fun ‘mommy missions’”

The best thing: You all get to come along for the ride.

(Figuratively speaking, of course. Unless I know you in real life…then you are more than welcome to come along for the ride. You could even star in a video if you want.)

 
Want to know why you might want to come along for the ride?

Well, GottaLoveChevyDFW is hosting a few giveaways during the month of September.

• Girlfriend Getaway to Chicago: Who doesn’t love getting away with their girlfriends for a relaxing weekend?  Beginning September 2nd, you can register to win a Girlfriend Getaway  for two to Chicago, IL.  The package includes a $2,500 JNR Incorporated travel voucher.  The travel voucher is redeemable for travel services from JNR Incorporated and is valid from one year from the date it is received and has no value upon expiration.  The voucher is good for the winner and one guest. 

 

• Pick Your Purse Sweepstakes:  This giveaway involves free purses. Expensive free purses. Can I get an “Amen”?   Beginning September 2nd, you can register to win a $1,000 American Express gift certificate to purchase a designer purse of your choice by registering on the DFW Facebook Fan page, www.facebook.com/gottalovechevydfw. 

 

Be sure to visit GottaLoveChevyDFW to enter both of these amazing giveaways!

Check out my introduction video and follow along with my adventures as I experience a bit of “Malibu Mayhem” this month.

Lynley Phillips Intro Video for GottaLoveChevyDFW.com from Lynley Phillips on Vimeo.

The  Girlfriend Getaway is being sponsored by Chevy dealers who gave chosen bloggers a 2010 Chevy Malibu to test drive for one month and blog about experiences with the car. Girlfriend Getaway has given the bloggers fun projects to complete and gift cards with which to accomplish said projects.

Enter to WIN $$ for DFW Deals through Juice in the City

A group of moms in Collin County that love to find great deals for their families have come together over the summer to launch Juice in the City in Collin County.

It launched August 16^th and every day there is a new deal for burb moms.  You won’t have to drive very far because their deals are focused on moms who live in Plano, Frisco, Allen, McKinney and the surrounding burbs.

And there is more…

Burb Mom is giving away THREE $30 credits to Juice in the City to be used toward the deal of your choice!

And over there your money goes a looooooong way.

To enter:

• Sign up for the Juice in the City daily DEAL email and leave us a comment below that you did.  (Note:  if you land on the Dallas-Fort Worth page, click on the “Other Cities” tab and go to the Collin County page to sign up).

 

Want additional entries? (please leave a comment below for EACH entry you completed)

• Post a link to this contest on your Facebook page.
• Send an email to 3 of your DFW friends with a link to this contest (1 entry for each 3 friends emailed).

So, what kind of deals is Juice in the City bringing?

Today’s deal (Friday 8/27):

$75 (70% off ) for a high end professional photo session with Simple Desires Photography.

Let’s face it, getting a five year old to sit still for a photograph is one the hardest challenges out there. So if you’re looking to get some great photos taken of your little ones while they’re still so young and innocent (most of the time), we highly suggest you find a photographer who isn’t into making kids sit like statues! This is why Steve of Simple Desire Photography is superb: he’ll climb all over slides, benches and obstacle courses, allowing your kids to be their energetic selves (even in 90+ degree heat!) and by doing so he gets the essence of his subjects. Why pay for stiff portraits that will always remind you of how stressful that photo session was when you can purchase candid, natural pics you’ll more than happily turn into a shrine on your walls – photos that evoke pleasant memories and show you who your kids REALLY are!   And the best thing about this deal is that you will get a CD of your session.  Simple Desire Photography services anywhere in the DFW area.

Good luck!

The winners will be notified by email.  The contest will end midnight NEXT Friday, September 3.  All prizes provided by Juice in the City – Collin County.

Starting the school year off right

Pencils are sharpened.

Backpacks are packed.

Lunch boxes are full of healthy options.

Yet your child still seems a bit anxious about getting back into the school routine.

The excitement of the first day of school can fade quickly, leaving children (and parents) feeling stressed, anxious and longing for the laid back days of summer. The beginning of a new school year is a great time to embrace structure and routine, uniting the family in a common goal of having a peaceful academic year. Below are a few tips to ease those post-first day anxieties and establish a firm beginning to a new school year.

• Do prep work the night before. Getting kids out of bed, fed and dressed in the morning is stressful enough without having to run around searching for a pen to sign a homework assignment or attempting to make three different types of sandwiches. Take fifteen minutes each night to do some initial prep work. Lay out clothes (complete with shoes, socks, and accessories) the night before. Pack lunchboxes and set out non-perishable breakfast items on the table. Be sure that all paperwork is signed, completed and tucked into the appropriate place before heading to bed.

 

• Fuel up for the day. Before anyone heads out on a long car trip, they ensure their vehicle has a full tank of gas. Do the same thing for your children. Before sending them out the door for eight hours of learning, fill their stomachs with healthy and sustainable food. Avoid sugary cereals that will quickly digest and stick to lean proteins and complex carbohydrates. Have a picky eater on your hand? There are many websites that provide ideas for healthy and fun breakfast alternatives.

 

• Go to bed. The human brain needs rest and plenty of it, especially if it is expected to learn and process new information on a daily basis. Children need an average of 9-11 hours of sleep a night. Set a bedtime for school nights and stick with it. Be sure to enhance the mood of the house for sleep about thirty minutes before the arrival of bedtime. Turn off televisions, computers and cell phones. Dim the lights. Partake in quiet activities such a finishing up homework, reading a book or working a puzzle. A calm, quiet atmosphere signals the brain, letting it know that it is time to sleep.

 

• Communicate. The best way to have a successful school year is to keep the lines of communication open. With younger age groups, this can be done by sharing the highs and lows of ones day around the supper table.  Older children are less likely to want to sit down and have a chat with their parents. Consider talking via text message or during the course of a favorite family activity. Understand that most children are not going to spontaneously share their feelings about school, however they do want to talk about these feelings with their parents. Be creative in finding ways to talk to kids and then be consistent with the communication.

 

Use these tips to get the school year started off right for the entire family, making children’s’ academic experiences positive for everyone.

Raising a Champion – the good, the bad and the ugly

We all remember signing our first born up for little league.  Wow!  He’s got such talent!  He can catch the ball!  And HIT!  Visions dance in our heads: select teams, UIL Championships, college scholarships, Olympics, a high-paying professional career.  It’s a lot of fun to fantasize – everyone does it. 

Eventually you realize that those dreams only apply to a very small percentage of kids, and yours isn’t among them.  But he loves baseball, soccer, summer swim team, football, tennis and goes on to have a wonderfully ordinary childhood and an enjoyably unremarkable love of sports. 

Despite your bona fide delight in your child, somewhere in the back of your mind it lingers….  What if…  I’d pushed harder, hired a private coach, gotten more involved, was less involved – what if? 

I’m sure logic and observation tell you that odds are pretty good things would turn out just the way they are now despite additional parental efforts.  Athletics are up to the athlete – their body, their mind, and their desire.  And remember the phrase… careful what you wish for. 

I’m writing about possibly raising a champion.  I haven’t raised Colt McCoy or Michael Phelps.  But at this tenuous point in time, it is still in the realm of possibility, barring injury, teenage attitude, or any life event that can change it all in a heartbeat.  The sport that chose my son is swimming.  But much of how it affects our lives can be applied to any sport at a high level. 

Sacrifice – obviously!

My son sacrifices a lot.  At thirteen, he is highly cognizant that his social life is not what he’d hoped.  He is released from school early to train; he doesn’t get home until nearly 8pm each night and still must tackle homework.  He practices at 6am on Saturdays.  Friends over after school and sleepovers are few and far between.  

Obviously, this sacrifice bleeds over into family life.  Meals are rushed or in shifts.  I spend an inordinate amount of time in the car.  We plan our vacations, celebrations, etc. around the yearly rhythm of the sports season.  When we vacation, we are up at 5am anyway, to train with a local team.  I have to work extra hard to make sure that my son’s schedule doesn’t take away from the activities and desires of the rest of the family. 

Being a working parent with a super-athlete is difficult. The logistics of being released early from school and daily or twice-daily practices proved to be impossible to combine with my career, so my career has been back-burnered until he drives.

Nutrition

Let me just say that eating 5,000 calories a day is not as easy as it sounds.  Good food is a requirement for any growing kid, and I do my best to provide nutritionally dense whole foods.  Increase the difficulty factor by having your child out of the house (or asleep) for all but 40 minutes in a 14+ hour period and it becomes more challenging.  As I look at the coming years, his training time and his caloric needs will both increase by 25% or more.  Most of this is my job, but some of it rests on him too.  He eats until he’s full, and then tries to eat some more.  He eats a lot of stuff he doesn’t really like, but know he has to.

Travel

While we are fortunate to live in an area where there are plenty of opportunities to compete, as his skill increases, he must travel farther and farther afield to compete against (or train with) the best.  Sometimes with us, and sometimes without.  I have accompanied him on five-day journeys where I got to see him swim a total of 93 seconds.  I have NOT accompanied him on trips I term “black holes.”  His ability to articulate his experience is sadly lacking, as are photos.   In a nutshell, travel is expensive and stressful.  But very worth it.

The Head –both of us

Achievement is thrilling, gratifying and elating.  For the athlete and their staff (that would be me).  Falling short can be devastating and an athlete’s ability to pick up the pieces and move on is critical.  To see him fail is gut wrenching. There are many roles a parent can choose to play at times like these.  Mine is to hide in the bathroom.  Critique is the coach’s job, and false kudos from me are hollow.  At thirteen he’s old enough to work through it; he failed and he knows it.  But he’s still “my baby” and to watch him twist with mental agony after so much hard work is painful.  I have to trust in his “head’ and hope that he doesn’t see me crying too.

Keeping it all in Perspective

He’s just a kid.  While time and logistics dictate that the mothers of other like-minded athletes are my “village” I also try to spend as much time as possible hanging with other moms to help my “mothering style” be more like theirs and less like some of the rabid parents of super-athletes.  Likewise for my son – time spent with non-swimming friends feels more normal. 

He’s just a kid.  Only this morning, I was shaking him awake to head to practice and he said, “Mom, I’m soooo tired.”  He needs to have some control over his own life and letting him choose to skip practice today will help him feel centered.  I’ll mumble excuses to his coach and pay the 17yr old neighbor kid to kick his butt around the gym for a few hours this afternoon to make up for it. 

He’s just a kid.  But he has big dreams and some amazing opportunities. The weight of that, how much he “owns” it concerns me sometimes.  Balancing that against his recent invitation to train at the Olympic Training Center in Colorado, right now it seems worth it.  But ask me again when I am hiding in the bathroom while he is fighting to hide his tears from his coach, or gamely getting back in the pool after throwing up, and I’ll let you know.

Tips for Fun at the Lake

One of the best ways to beat the summer heat is to spend a day (or even a few hours) at one of our many local lakes in the DFW area with the kids and family or as a fun day out with friends. I have had the personal pleasure of visiting many of our lakes, and so far my favorites are Lewisville Lake at Lake Park and Grapevine Lake at Murrell Park just south of Flower Mound on the north shore of the lake.

During the summertime, I make it a special priority to get the kids out as much as I can so they can enjoy the water while it lasts. Murrell Park has become one of my personal favorites because of its easy access and free price tag. Although Murrell Park does not offer a playground like Lake Park does, it does offer quieter and more secluded surroundings as well as many hiking and biking trails in close proximity. Murrell park currently has tent and primitive camping, but is undergoing an expansion to increase camping facilities.

I’ve found the following tips helpful when planning a day out with young children:

1.) Wear sunscreen and bring extra, applying as directed. There is nothing worse than spending good quality time together just to be miserable afterward. Bring a hat and sunglasses for extra protection.

2.) Bring towels and wear old shoes you don’t mind wearing in the water and therefor getting wet.

3.) Bring a cooler with drinks, water, fruit, and premade sandwiches or other snacks to eat. Alcohol is prohibited at Lake Grapevine (check with other lakes on their rules).

4.) If you don’t mind carrying them, bring foldable lightweight chairs and a radio with batteries.

5.) Bring fun water toys such as pool noodles, water squirters, flotation devices.

6.) WEAR A LIFE JACKET! There are no lifeguards on duty and a drowning can happen in seconds!

7.) Don’t forget your fully charged camera!

You can also take these tips from my dog, Lily:

How to choose a preschool for your child

Allow me to be the bearer of bad news: the start of school is just around the corner.

Good-bye, Summer! I feel like I hardly knew you.

Hello, structured school days. My Type-A personality has been missing you.

For some parents, the start of a new school year means their child’s very first experience with the world of school via entering preschool. Starting preschool is a significant milestone in the life of a child (and the life of a parent…those apron strings are always hard to cut). Such a step can be an intimidating one for parents as well as for the child. Even after the decision has been made to send a child to preschool, parents are still faced with deciding upon the exact preschool where they will send their child. Living in a large area such as Dallas/Fort Worth gives parents a vast array of preschool options from which to make their selection. Just like with any decision, having to choose from a variety of options can make it difficult to decide on one particular preschool program. Equipping oneself with information and then forming a plan of action can make the difficult task of choosing a preschool a bit easier for parents.

Decide what the family wants and needs from a preschool.

All families have different needs and desires. Such individualities also impact the decisions one makes for their child. When attempting to decide upon a preschool, think about what the individual, specific needs of the family.

• Schedule. When is the best time for the child to attend school? Is a five day a week school schedule desirable or would a two day-a-week preschool work better? Preschools differ in their hours of operation and the number of days a week a child attends. Consider what type of preschool schedule works best for the family before choosing a particular school.
• Proximity to home. Some parents do not mind driving a long distance to take children to school while others need a preschool that is close to home. Take into consideration how long it will take to get to preschool for drop-off and pick-up and determine if that amount of driving time works with the family’s schedule.
• Fundamental approach to education. If a particular learning style is important to the family, only consider preschools that take that approach to education. If having a religious-based education is something that is desired, be sure to consider area churches and synagogue that provide such a preschool.
• Cost. In most cases, preschool costs money. Take a look at the family’s finances and decide how much of the annual budget is going to be allocated towards education. If the purse strings are tight, perhaps preschools with high tuition rates should be marked off the list. However, keep in mind that several preschools offer a limited amount of scholarships or tuition assistance for those in need.
• Discipline strategies. Once children have hit the preschool years, parents tend to have found their groove with a particular style of discipline. When deciding upon a preschool, be sure that the school’s discipline strategies are similar to those used at home. Take note if a school simply relies on the old standard of a “time-out corner” rather than helping students work through and resolve issues. If discipline strategies seem extreme or contradict the parenting put in place in the home, perhaps another preschool should be considered.

Compile a list of local schools.

After deciding upon the values and principals desired in a preschool, make a list of local schools that fit the bill. To find potential schools use local parenting websites to chat on-line with area parents and take time to scan the advertisements in free parenting magazines. Pay attention when driving around town running errands, making note of the preschools close to home. A tangible list of preschool names, location and contact information can help narrow down choices in an organized manner.

Visit, chat and visit some more.

Once a list is devised, start talking. Call potential preschools and ask if you can have an on-site visit. Inquire about any upcoming Open Houses for perspective parents. Most schools have an open-door policy and welcome the visits of potential students and their parents. Observe a class and see how things run at perspective schools. Ask the director if he/she would recommend a current student’s parent that would be willing to answer questions. Talk to friends and ask them where their children attend preschool. Question fellow mothers about what they like and dislike about their child’s preschool. A child’s education is extremely important. Never feel embarrassed for asking lots of questions and seeking out plenty of advice when attempting to decide upon a preschool.

Assess the basics.

Once a few schools show potential, assess some basic issues. Is the preschool certified and accredited (either through their particular certification board or through national accreditation programs)?  Texas has developed its own system for ensuring that preschools are not only teaching young children but also making sure students are equipped with the skills needed to perform successfully in the kindergarten classroom. Another basic issue to consider is student to teacher ratio, meaning how many students are assigned to one teacher (a good ratio is no more than 12 to 1). Consider teacher turnover rate as well. Are teachers constantly rotating in and out of the school or does the school keep the same staff year after year? Research shows that children who have had several preschool teachers have a harder time adjusting to school. A large staff turnover rate could mean a particular preschool is not a good choice. Parents must also look at the facility itself. Are classrooms clean, playgrounds fenced and safe and learning materials in good condition? The basic structure of a preschool, from quality of teacher to quality of playground equipment, can be a significant determining factor when deciding on a preschool.

Get started.

Preschool has been shown to be more than painting a picture and eating a few crackers with friends. It has dramatic, positive effects on the life of a child. It is not too early to begin thinking about preschool choices for a child. Getting started now with the preschool decision making process can help parents make a solid decision they feel comfortable with and that works best for their child.

The magic of pearls…and other mysteries of motherhood

Today has felt like one Parenting:FAIL after another.

Despite the need my children had to burn off some energy, I was hesitant to send them outdoors in case a passerby overheard all the crying and tantruming. Seriously, it was one fit after another. Someone was crying because we were playing Memory as opposed to Candy Land. Another was crying because we were playing Diego Memory as opposed to Strawberry Shortcake Memory. And a third (Can you guess who that might have been) was contemplating crying because we were playing a board game at all.

This was all before 8:30am.

The theme of the day has pretty much been that no one wants to do anything I have suggested.

No one wanted to get dressed.

No one wanted to stay in their pjs.

No one wanted to do an art project together.

No one wanted to do an art project alone.

No one wanted to participate in chore time.

No one wanted to sit out during chore time.

No one wanted to ride bikes outside.

No one wanted to sit inside and be bored.

You get the picture, right?

As moms, we all experience days like this…days in which the entire house seems plagued by grumpiness, where the best of intentions go awray and where nap time/bedtime cannot arrive fast enough.

On days such as these, I attempt to find the little things to make my world a bit calmer and a bit more serene. I channel my 1950′s housewife tucked deep inside and pull a few tricks out of my SAHM hat on days when I would much rather run out the door screaming than parent.

1. Toss on some jewels. Sure, June Cleaver had her pearls. I have a deep love for chunky jewelry as well. I find on rough days if I look a bit spunky, my attitude can find some spunk as well. Most likely, June wore those pearls to merely survive in a house with two boys and an overly-chipper husband.

2. I liven up my food. Casa de phillips is home to many a paper and plastic plate. However, I find that using our real (read: very breakable) dishes on a regular basis adds a bit of refinement to my day. Sure I may only be sipping water while unloading the dishwasher for the second time that morning, but at least I am doing it with a bit of style.

3. I take a look at the little faces around me.

Sure those faces might not have the most angelic of expressions on them…

And they might be tinged with a bit of mischievousness…

But they make me smile anyway.

What little things serve as your “pick-me-ups” on those less than stellar parenting days?

A Quick Trip to the Grocery Store

My grocery list:

Oh, are you going to the store?
Can you pick up a few things?
Let me just add a few details to my list for you.

Hmmmm…let me be a little bit more specific.

Wait.
I thought of a few more things.
It is kinda confusing.
Let me have that list!

Maybe I should just go myself…

Put those babies to work: Chores for toddlers

Moms often struggle with finding the balance between keeping a house running (laundry, vaccuming, dusting, mopping, more laundry) and interacting with their young children. Instead of tending to daily chores while small children play under foot or nap, have children help with the household chores. Toddlers have the ability to help with various chores around the home, making an important contribution to the family. Involving young children in household chores increases their self-help skills, enourages independance and builds self-esteem. The best part about a toddler helping with various chores is they tend to think helping is fun and are incredibly eager to help out Mom or Dad.

In the kitchen, toddlers can help sweep up floors with a small handheld broom and dustpan. They can wipe down tables and chairs and take nonbreakable dishes to the sink at the end of a meal. Toddlers can also help load items into the dishwasher, such as spoons, reusable containers, and plastic drink cups.

Toddlers’ rooms are also a great place where they can help out Mom or Dad. Toddlers can put their dirty clothes into the laundry hamper and place shoes into an easily accessable shoe bin. They can put toys away into a toy basket and help tidy their sleeping space. Young children can be taught how to hang up clothing, such as knit shirts or jackets, onto child-sized hangers.

In larger family areas, such as the living room, toddlers can help out by dusting with a dry cloth or a premade duster. They can tidy pillows on couches, put books on lower bookshelves, and help deliver  “lost” items to their appropriate location in the house. Toddlers can also be of assistance in the laundry room by helping sort whites and colors, putting wash into the machine, and folding small items such as washclothes and towels.

Involving children in household chores at an early age teaches responsibility and establishes the notion that a family needs to work together as a unit to keep their house running effectiently. Although a toddler is quite able to help with a variety of chores, be mindful of the chiild’s safety. Cleaning products should never be given to a child to use nor should toddlers be allowed to help clean around hot water, stovetops, or dangerous items such as kitchen knives. Avoid micro-managing toddlers as they complete their chores, instead provide positive guidance and praise them for a job well done.

How does your toddler help out at home? Leave a comment and share with fellow readers about how your little ones help contribute to household duties.

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