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O Tannenbaum…Gesundheit!

My husband and I have celebrated 18 Christmases together.

15 of those have been celebrated under the plastic boughs of a faux-tree.

The first few Christmases we had a fake fir for financial reasons. Once we were a bit more established (Christmas #4) we jumped in our Cherokee and drove to a local tree farm.

I love a real tree. They are so real. They are so tree-y.

We chose a beautiful tree.
Tied it to the roof.
Toted it home.
Set it in the living room.
Decorated it with care.
Stood back and admired it.

Around midnight the first night we both started to sniffle.

Odd. That we would both catch colds at the same time.

The sniffles continued throughout the entire holiday season.

Merry Christmas! sniffle. sniffle.

The sniffles were thrown out to the curb with the dead tree 4 weeks later.

Oh! Maybe we are allergic to certain Christmas trees.

Year two we toted home a different variety with the same results.

Merry Christmas! sniffle. sniffle.

Year three we toted home a different variety with the same results.

Merry Christmas! sniffle. sniffle.

By the fourth year (ya, we are quick learners…) we decided we were more fake tree folk because being merry is much easier when you can breathe.

Fast forward 11 Christmases to a gray minivan full of three boys passing a local Christmas tree “farm”* today:

Reid: Why don’t we get our Christmas tree there?
Me: We already have a tree! Remember helping me put it together?
Ryan: Those are REAL TREES.
Reid: Oh.
Ryan: You don’t want a REAL TREE because they are FULL OF BUGS and when you take them home there are SQUIRRELS and RATS living in them IN YOUR HOUSE…

I love it when I don’t have to say anything more.

*The Christmas tree “farm” is actually the pumpkin patch after a holiday make-over that I animated here. Oh, and guess what?  Yep, there is an identical Christmas tree “farm” next door.